Excellent leadership requires as much self-consciousness as confidence. Omar Bradley’s advice to “set your course by the stars, not the lights of passing ships” reminds me “True north is the internal compass that guides you successfully through life. It represents who you are as a human being at your deepest level… is based on what is most important to you, your most cherished values, your passions and motivations, the sources of satisfaction in your life” writes Bill George in True North.
As a leader I often speak of stated and operational values, what we say and what we do. I find it helpful to question the words that come out of my own mouth. It is easy to believe what we say is true when as often we say what we want to be true. That is where healthy dialogue comes in. I learn from being challenged. I’ll give a specific example. I spent four years at an all-boys Catholic high school and then three years in a male seminary followed by three years in the mostly male army. For ten formative years with men I hadn’t studied with or listened seriously to women. I came back from war to a college where feminist students rightfully claimed the microphone and was taught by men and women professors from all faiths and those who had none.
I was fortunate to learn from women and to have my Catholic male assumptions challenged, to be disagreed with and had to unlearn some of what I thought was true. I also observed the lights many passing economic and philosophical ships. I reexamined my values and clarified my true north.
When were your values challenged? Did you readjust your true north?
Good thoughts Ed. True North. Knowing what your true north is is a process.
When I was in college, I thought I wanted to be in the medical sciences-
My major was biology and chemistry for years. But I am a people person
and didn’t want to work in a lab- not my north star. I switched my major to Psychology and Sociology and was on my true path.
I remember some of those women from SICC.
Enlightening, Ed. At various times in my life, the North Star I have followed seemed to have been lost in the haze of day-to-day struggles within me; trying to balance what I thought was right and true, with the opinions of others and the selfish claims of my own ego. The navigation that this requires itself requires early good parenting, consistent accurate mentoring and loving help in sifting through what is real and what is simply imagined or desired. Even at my advanced age, navigating by my North Star can still be a difficult task for me.
Bob,
Well said. We all need your humility in recognizing how many times we get lost. I think of programming our values into us like a gyroscope and when we tilt away and become conscious of being off balance we can be brought back to to a center point.
Ed
My “true north” or my true values only became consciously known to me when I was challenged and they were quickly felt. Once the challenge passed, they went back to the subconscious standing by for the next challenge. In other words, my true values were not normally visible though they may have guided me in life. For much of my life, until a meaningful challenge came along, I’m not sure I had much of an idea what my true values were. Maybe still don’t.
Rob,
Thanks. That is insightful and I believe a common experience. Sometimes my challenges are external and at other times I face opportunities and choices that make me uncomfortable and I have to
face the best and worst aspects of who I am. I am most fortunate when my better angels guide me and that they do not completely disappear. They show up in the next crisis of conscience. Of course the challenge is to listen to them.
Ed – essential, good words, good thoughts; to read your words is to have my better nature nurtured, thank God.
Thank you for this reminder, Ed. Life is a journey. Fortunate to know you and Lin along the way.
Thank you